Putting the Hoss in the Saddle

Hoss wasn’t a brand that I was incredibly familiar with; most bike shops in my area don’t carry the brand. However, when I found myself with a gift certificate to Hoss I didn’t hesitate to order a pair of shorts because all my shorts are now snug in the waist. I blame this entirely on my wife, who shrinks all my clothes in the laundry. So after much thought, meditation, and prayer, I chose Hoss’s Stallion model. The Stallion model is a handsome board short cut and I prefer that style.

For a company not as well know as Fox, Oakley, or Pearl Izumi they did a superb job on the construction of these shorts. First off I ordered them a size larger than usual–every pair of shorts I have ever purchased for biking run small. I attribute this to a mafia conspiracy. So the fact that these shorts fit was the first plus.

The next thing I noticed was the chamois. The softest thing to ever handle my undercarriage. One of the nicest things about this chamois is the smallest and finest stitching of any chamois I’ve ever worn. I have a pair of shorts that were expensive, but they have massive stitches holding the chamois to the shorts, which gives me a very unpleasant rash on long rides. I haven’t gotten a rash yet from this chamois (plus!). Another thing I liked is the chamois on a removable mess short liner with spandex leg grippers. I haven’t ridden without the chamois yet, or swapped the liner into another short, but you could if you so choose. It’s nice to have option.   Read more

Küat Alpha Bike Rack Review

It’s pronounced “KOO-ATT”

I used to think a rack is a rack is a rack. I only cared about mobility, not caring if my bike got scratched or how easy the rack was to install, I just wanted to get to the trail. For years I’ve been tossing bikes in the back of my trusty Toyota, but as my bike wealth grew with my income (marginally), I started looking for ways to transport bikes without damaging them or scratching my truck. When my bikes started costing more than $1000 as so, so many of them do these days, I felt a nagging sense of neglect tossing them willy-nilly into the bed. I’ve tried most or all the tricks: the two-by-four with fork mounts, putting fork mounts on the side of the bed, disassembling the whole bike and squeezing it into the hatchback, roof racks, trunk racks, you name it, I gave it a shot. Right now I’m kicking myself for not trying a trailer hitch rack with my pick-up, for some reason it just didn’t make sense. I have a camper shell on the truck now and I’ve been digging rides from friends with HUGE vehicles when we go for rides, so maybe that’s why. For about a year or so, my buds have been telling me to try one of the hitch-mounted bike racks that have gotten so popular lately. I never considered buying one when I could just mooch off them. Besides, I like being able to drop my tailgate any time I want and sit idly on the back of my truck like the dumb yokel I am.

I did my time as a bike mechanic at the LBS and installed countless racks on more yuppie SUVs than any of you could ever imagine. Not my proudest moments, and I never found a rack I was really impressed with. Most were heavy, ungainly, unsteady, too big or small, or worse, horribly unattractive. I did start noticing the hitch-rack trend gaining popularity, and I feared inevitable hernia operations from lifting the beasts onto our customers like-sized vehicles. Then I lifted the Küat Alpha Rack.  Read more

Julbo Dirt Sunglasses Review

The Precarious blend of Performance and Fashion- Julbo does it

I am a sunglasses freak, an addict, some would consider it a problem. I don’t. It’s my favorite accessory. I’m not into jewelry, watches, “mandals,” or high fashion. I just learned what couture means. I don’t like to be without at least a couple choices for shades. And I’m picky, very picky. Some shades look good but fall off your face while playing hopscotch, others grip your face with a ferocity that would satisfy Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Some look good, but fog up while you’re riding, or give you a headache after a half an hour. Finding one pair of shades that satisfy all the necessary criteria is a personal grail quest–some of us will never find them, even though we know they’re out there.

Yesterday I rode a rough thirty miles wearing the Julbo brand “Dirt” sunglasses, built specifically for mountain biking. The product label boasts mountain bike specific qualities such as “helmet friendly,” and “shock absorbent temples and nose pads.” My quest for the perfect pair of shades still continues, but I feel like I’ve taken one step closer. Let’s talk about what I didn’t like first, it’ll be quick, I liked a lot more than I didn’t: They’re white, which is an easy enough problem to solve, I’ll just order a dark-framed pair; huge white shades are for Paris Hilton and butterfaces. Okay, that’s about it on the negative side, let’s talk about what I liked, broken down into my four criteria to consider when buying shades:

Fit:

When you put on a pair of sunglasses, you shouldn’t know you’re wearing them other than your brain registering that you’re seeing in a different color. No pinching, no uncomfortable rubbing, no ugly red indentions on your nose when you take them off, no headache after a couple hours. For performance shades, here’s the kicker: if you forget you’re wearing them, the fit is good. They also have to stay on while doing whatever it is you do, without having to use one of those horrendously fratty head-straps. The Dirt from Julbo would hang on to an epileptic in an earthquake. One criterion down.

Anti-Fog:

Being able to see is paramount for adventure sports. A lot of optics companies claim their lenses are anti-fog, and I’ve tried most of them. I’ve found less than half actually deliver. I live in the sweltering humidity of Georgia, the perfect testing ground for lenses that claim to be “fogless.” I am a sweaty, dirty, fog-inducing individual. After thirty miles on a humid day in May, I could still see while wearing the Julbos, an unusual experience for me. I didn’t even get any stripes of sweat dripping down the lenses. I don’t understand optics technology very well, I just know that they work or don’t. We all have our personal taste for lenses: Polarized, rose-colored, amber, photochromatic, etc., but the most important aspect is whether you can still see after ripping down a trail or climbing up a rock face. Two criteria down.

Look:

Sunglasses are for protecting your eyes from the sun, right? Well, I guess so, but I will NOT look like a total tool to protect my eyes from harmful UV rays. I’d rather just close them. So my shades gots to look good. This is more difficult than it sounds, and I sympathize with the companies that attempt to make eyewear that functions in both the fashion and performance arenas. Sometimes making something perform well negates the ability to make it look good. But Julbo did it. My wife complimented them the second she saw them, and it’s rare that she wontonly strokes my ego. Julbo’s headquarters are in France, I think that has something to do with their ability to make their shades look good while functioning at the same time. Three criteria down, almost there!!!

Price:

These beauties aren’t cheap ($120-$160), but you get what you pay for. I generally don’t like to break three figures on shades, no matter how great they are I’ll eventually lose or break them. But in this case I feel the price is justified, I can think of other sunglasses companies that charge a lot more for a product inferior to this one. I would rather pay $100 for a piece of gold than pay $50 for a piece of crap. Sometimes, it’s just worth it. I can’t get excited about the price, but I’m willing to pay for this level of craftsmanship.

According to their website, the Julbo brand has been around for more than a century, but they’re considered an “emerging” brand in the performance optics market. I look forward to enjoying and testing more of their product if they’re all as good as their Dirt model of performance eyewear.

Topeak Dual-Touch Stand Review

Every rider, regardless of age or number of years riding, comes to a point in their lives when good just isn’t good enough. What I am referring to isn’t that “come to God moment” when you see the bike of your dreams (Maverick ML8) and compare it to what you are currently riding. No, what I am talking about is the need for bike storage. As bikes continue piling up in garages, or like me, in the family room of a townhome, there quickly arises a point where putting bikes in corners and/or against walls just isn’t good enough.

With the bike season upon us once again, and a new bike on the horizon, it was time for me to do my due diligence on bike storage.

My conditions were simple:

1. Hold at a minimum 2 bikes (regardless of frame type)
2. It could not take up much space
3. No holes in walls or ceilings

I checked out a number of bike racks, both online and in local shops. Most were hideous, or looked unstable; then I came across the Topeak® Dual-Touch™ bike stand. It is elegant, minimal footprint, and it was fully adjustable to accommodate different frames.

I head to my local bike shop, purchase the Topeak® bike stand, and head home. Excitedly, I rip open the box, and grab a 5mm Allen wrench from my saddle bag, I quickly assemble the hooks to the cross-bracket, and the bracket to the stand. 10 minutes and 8 bolts later I have my bike stand assembled. I get out the stud finder, locate a ceiling joist, extend the upper stanchion and lock it in place.

Being mildly impressed by the ease of setup, I grab two bikes and throw them on the stand. Perfect! Now I need to go buy one more Topeak® Dual-Touch bike stand and all of my bikes will be off the floor, obviously to make room for additional bikes…

Specifications:
Weight: 11 lbs
Weight Capacity: 40 lbs per hook | 160 lbs total
Max ceiling height: 126” | 10’5”

Author’s Rating:
Ease of Setup: 4/5 (Stud finder required)
Stability: 5/5
Looks: 5/5

Harlot H4M Murray Short Review

Big on Style and Durability.

First off, I rarely wear women’s clothes anymore, it’s been ages (don’t ask). And that was my first thought when I received a pair of Murray Shorts by Harlot Clothing Co, “but I don’t even cross-dress these days, why would I want to wear a pair of women’s mountain bike shorts? I don’t even like wearing men’s mountain bike shorts.” Admittedly, they looked badass and masculine, that’s when I realized that “H4M” stands for “Harlot for Men.”

Harlot’s line of men’s clothing is very limited compared to their expansive line-up for the ladies, but with a name like Harlot, you can’t expect them to cater to the dudes too much. I made a point of calling their customer service line and letting them know that they need to beef up on their menswear. I’ve been known to rant about the substandard offerings of the bicycle industry’s clothing options, so I was excited when I saw that these shorts at least looked cool, and it only got better once I tried them on.

Very understated and sleek, you can wear the Murray Shorts out in public and no one will think you’re in bike gear. Before I tested this theory however, I decided to take them on a short ride to test their performance and durability. Despite their sleek appearance, the Murray Short is very roomy in the leg and has seatbelt-style straps on the waistline so you can optimize your fit. The gusseted crotch provided unlimited flexibility and comfort.

Van Damme could have worn these in Bloodsport and still won the Kumite. There’s no chamois in these babies, but the nylon/polyester blend is comfortable enough for freeriding or a short cross-country jaunt. As I said before, they’re a lot roomier than they look and are designed to have enough room for slim-fitting bike shorts underneath if you’re gonna be riding longer than a couple hours. My only complaint about this style of shorts is how hot they get with a pair of traditional chamois bike shorts underneath. In temperate weather it’s fine, but hot summer days will wear you out fast if you’re wearing bike shorts under the Murrays.

Now a word on durability: Remember those “Bike” brand shorts your PE coach used to wear? You know, the nut-hugging short-shorts with the double-snap waist tab? If one so chose, you could slide into third on a bed of glass and the shorts wouldn’t have a scratch. Well, the Murray Short is like that, but it looks good (Win-Win!!). It’s also water-resistant, so they won’t get heavy and chafe if you go for a wet ride. They also sport a moisture-wicking waistband to ensure your comfort through sweat, dirt, and grime.

Best of all, they’re made right here in the U.S.A. out of North American-sourced materials. Kudos to Harlot for making a clothing product even I approve of, now if they would just make some more stuff for guys!!

The Straight Dirt:

The Good
Sleek, comfortable, attractive, performance-oriented, doesn’t look like typical cycling gear, affordable.

The Bad
Hot as hell on a summer day with bike shorts underneath. By themselves = no problem.

Murray Short:  $89.00

Harlot Clothing Co.
68 Camino Torcido Loop
Santa Fe, NM 87507

www.harlotwear.com

CamelBak M.U.L.E. NV Review

Is it me or do hydration packs keep getting bigger? Not that I’m complaining, but I remember when everybody rolled with the half-liter CamelBak and we were all impressed by not having to reach for our water bottles. Well, as most things in the outdoor/performance sport industry, my beloved CamelBak M.U.L.E. has been given a serious makeover. I’ve always been impressed by CamelBak products, they’ve weathered many imitators and still hold the gold. Afterall, they were the first hydration systems on the scene so they’ve had a reputation to uphold. Over the years I’ve gone through four or five different hydration systems, and countless bladders (more on that later, no reason to buy new ones if you care for it properly).

So, I love CamelBak’s gear, but here’s the problem: Who the hell needs this much stuff on an average bike ride? I recently replaced my old M.U.L.E with the fancy new one, and the new one is great, I just won’t mountain bike with it. Personally, I’ve gone back to bottles as my rides aren’t quite as long as they used to be, and most of my races have a 10-mile loop or so before there’s a chance to refuel, so more time is spent cranking than hydrating. The new generation of M.U.L.E. weighs 2.41 lbs when EMPTY, and almost 9 lbs at full capacity (3 liters). 9 pounds! Some of us are weight weenies, some are not, but all of us will feel 9 lbs on our backs. I haven’t whipped out the scale, but I’m pretty sure that’s 9 lbs with a full reservoir before cargo. The specs on the M.U.L.E. NV rate it at having 600 cubic inches of cargo space. Another 600 cubic inches and I could use this thing for a thru-hike. In fact, with a little imagination, I bet I could do a cross-country cycling trip without panniers if I had this M.U.L.E. as my main-cargo and water carrier. In fact, I would gladly welcome the challenge of any takers and/or sponsors (Attn: CamelBak–I’ll gladly ride cross-country with nothing but a M.U.L.E. if you foot the bill. I travel cheap! please write to: bill@mtobikes.com).  Read more

Hoss Technical Gear’s Stallion Shorts Review

When I first got on my bike wearing the Hoss produced Stallion shorts, I swore—in both good and bad ways. On one hand, I cussed at myself for all the rides I had been on without a pair of mountain biking shorts; for all the discomfort I endured in the name of fitting in with or paying my dues to the greater mountain biking community (I thought I was enculturating myself…or earning my stripes by appreciating the purity of the ride in the absence of technical gear). On the other hand, I swore as a kind of reflex—a reaction to the astonishing comfort I felt the first time I took the saddle. Bottom line…these are a great product.

But let’s rewind this review. Before I ever took these riding shorts to the trail I had to have some sort of initial reaction to them, right? I must have had an original judgemental moment, a commencement of thought and possibly of opinion. Well, I think that moment went something like this; “Holy good-lookin’ shorts Batman!” Yes, these shorts have style. They have what I call post-ride functionality; they beg you to wear them, not just on the trail, but beyond it, to your favorite post-ride gin mill, a BBQ brisket and ribs lunch, or just around the house for the remainder of the day (I have done all three).

The Particulars

I did have some concerns as I held them out in front of me. I was immediately struck by the fact that yes, these are definitely a multi-function short; especially since the essential riding component—the padded spandex compression piece—is removable. Admittedly, at first glance this feature looked a bit odd. The shorts are essentially a two-in-one combo. The inner piece is attached to the outer shell at the hips by two thin, fragile strips of fabric with two small button-fastened loops. If you’ve ever seen Transformers, the inner piece hangs from the inside of the outer shell’s waistband like the mangled Megatron hangs from helicopter cables just before he’s dropped into the ocean. By prompting such a comparison, this feature immediately raised some durability concerns. “There is just no way these shorts will stay together when I ride,” I thought. It turns out these straps are really more of an organizational feature as they literally keep the two pieces together. Once I figured out that this odd and frail-looking suspension was not permanent—that the pieces were meant to be worn together but not attached at the hip (literally) — I felt much better about their durability. Twenty miles of testing under their belt, they have to this point held up perfectly.  Read more

Swiftwick Four Merino Sock Review

They say one advantage of wearing wool socks is that they will eliminate foot odor.  Wool breathes better than most other materials which means it removes moisture from the skin faster.  This reason alone should be enough to make the Swiftwick Four Merino riding socks worthy foot garments.  Believe it or not though, there’s more to them that might convince you of this.

The Swiftwick Four socks fit like…well, like something that fits perfectly (I want to say like a glove but a glove probably wouldn’t fit a foot very well).  They are a combination of cotton, nylon, and spandex which not only makes your feet smell better (or at least less like sweat), but also form-fits the socks to every contour of your foot.  I usually don’t like tight fitting clothes of any kind but the way these things grip your feet is surprisingly comfortable…especially when you’re on the trail and suddenly realize that your sock isn’t slipping off or bunched up in the toe of your shoe.

If you regularly or even occasionally get blisters from riding then you might consider getting yourself a pair of socks like these.  In addition to some extra padding underneath the foot that might help correct this problem, the Swiftwick Four has a “no seam” design which means, as you might have guessed, there aren’t any unnecessary pressure points or ridges irritating your feet.

With that said, the one gripe I do have about these socks is that the cuff is particularly tall (it stops about four inches above the ankle).  The more I think about it, the more I think that this feature likely does not suggest this is a winter specific riding sock.  If that were the case, the whole thing might be a little thicker.  This leads me to the conclusion that the tall cuff serves as an anchor; to prevent the rest of it from sliding around inside your shoe.  This cuff is mildly uncomfortable and given the way these socks grip the rest of your foot (especially the bear hug they give your arch), this might be a bit of an unnecessary feature.  However, this is more of a personal preference thing than a design flaw.

The bottom line is that the Swiftwick Four Merino is my new favorite riding companion.  The combination of the ultra-comfortable “no seam” design and breathability has me wanting to use these socks not only every time I ride but also for everything else I do.

SKS Airchecker – Duo Head

At first I thought there wouldn’t be much to say about the SKS Airchecker Duo Head Air pressure gauge, but I liked it more than I originally thought. Not a trail tool in my opinion–perhaps for the compulsives and anal-retentives among us that just have to know the exact pressure in their tires in both BAR and PSI (the Airchecker does both!) before a quick ride. You know the ones, the guy wearing a 3000 cubic-inch hydration pack on the local 5-mile loop, with 6,000 calories of carbs (just in case!), a pedal wrench, spare chain, torque wrench, flare gun, and one of those super-shiny NASA blankets to ward off hypothermia. Well he might carry it, but I think it’s a great shop tool or one to keep in the glove box. If you’re new to the sport it might be handy to have a pressure gauge nearby, but soon you should be able to approximate pressure by feel. But when in doubt, the Airchecker with its swiveling Duo Head design is built specifically for cycling. The head supports both Presta and Schrader valves (as it should), swivels ninety degrees for easy placement between spokes, has a digital readout for both PSI and BAR, and a deflation button for bringing down the pressure to exact specifications.

The good news is that SKS has satisfied both the most streamlined minimalist and the chunky-bagged draft horse. Even though I won’t be carrying it on the trail with me, the sleek little beauty has earned a very respectable placement on the top shelf of my shop toolbox. I don’t want to bag on the gearheads too much, afterall the importance of tire pressure has come to light in the last few years with the advent of tubeless tires. I like to know how low I can go, if you catch my drift. It will cost you about $20 more than a cheap tire gauge from Auto Zone, but the Airchecker has all the qualities of a great bike tool: small, light, tough, and simple.

All Harlot and No STD’s

The snow finally melted enough for me to break out the old steed after her long winter nap. While back in the saddle I tried out the new Harlot Hawkeye mountain bike shorts. These shorts are typically what you would consider a downhill short, but since the downhill trails are covered in snow and mud I figured why not a cross county ride?

These shorts are great, but they are not perfect, so let me start with what I don’t like, then the rest is what I do like. First off, if you are going to name your company Harlot your model names should be Harlot names. Hawkeye was a doctor in the TV show MASH, and he was no harlot. A boozer yes, but not a harlot. Harlot should use names like Jezebel (sounds like a harlot from biblical times) or Mustang Ranch (not really a ranch, but if you are familiar with Nevada you know what I mean). This is more a marketing issue, so Harlot if you want to hire me to make your line sound more sleazy consider me your newest harlot.

Second, and this is a complaint across the board with mountain bike shorts. I have not ordered one pair that fits right. They all run way too small. What is the deal with the mountain bike industry? When I order board shorts in the same size I have way too much crack hanging out. Mountain bike shorts…I feel like Santa Clause climbing into a wet suit. In reality, especially with a downhill short, mountain bike shorts should run big so you can fit pads under them if you so desire. There are some pretty nifty impact shorts on the market, but now in order to wear them I need to get another pair of mountain bike shorts. Sure I could lose a few pounds to fit better into them, but it is still winter here in Utah and I still have my winter coat…if you know what I mean. This must be a conspiracy to make shorts run small to motivate us to ride so those lbs will come off. I am sure this is one of those back smoke filled dark room conversations that take place at Interbike, and oh yes they do exist.  Read more

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